Anxiety, stress, depression, and low self-image or low self-esteem is something that is on the rise, according to recent studies. All of us have moments when we feel less confident and doubt ourselves or question our looks, abilities, and actions. This is part of being human. But sometimes that low self-esteem can be crippling and takes it to a step that endangers ourselves and our lives. Here are 12 proven tips for raising your self-confidence and self-esteem and getting the life you want.
Tag Archives: judgment
Who is Living Your Life? Subpersonalities or the Real YOU?
Are you living your life as a subpersonality or are you living your life as the REAL YOU? Do you sometimes feel that you are quick to react, judging others, feeling like a victim, being a caretaker, or just wanting more control over your emotions and your life? What is a subpersonality and how does it affect us us as children and adults? Learn more.
Let it Go!
Best wishes to you, our health and wellness friends!
Today the focus is on letting go…. surrendering the negative and bad qualities that exist inside of ourselves.
Surrendering the domination of the mind, emotions, and ego, when it is destructive to our health and happiness.
All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
It sounds simple enough. Just let go. Banish the ego. But why should we banish the ego? Is it really all that bad? Don’t we need the ego to survive and be successful? Yes, this is true. The ego helps us fight and prosper and helps us make good choices in life. The ego is the inner voice that is concerned for self welfare, safety, and success.
However, the ego can sometimes get in our way and prevent us from truly loving, being prosperous, successful, and achieving our dreams and goals, especially when we are trying to work as a team. There is no place for ego when working together with a group or a partner. So what exactly is the ego?
Here’s what Einstein had to say about the ego:
EGO = 1 / Knowledge.
More the knowledge lesser the Ego, lesser the knowledge, more the Ego.
An over-dominating ego can be what causes little children to start swinging at one another on the playground and little Freddie to come home with a black eye and a broken tooth. So what do we do when a person is angry, dominating, controlling, and our ego wants us to fight back and hold onto a grudge? The little voice inside says, “This feels bad. It’s not right. That person is wrong,” and if we let the ego take over, we might soon find ourselves hurt and angry, saying things we later regret, slamming doors, or in a boxing match with a friend or family member. Here is what Sigmund Freud has to say about the ego.
“One might compare the relation of the ego to the id with that between a rider and his horse. The horse provides the loco-motor energy, and the rider has the prerogative of determining the goal and of guiding the movements of his powerful mount towards it. But all too often in the relations between the ego and the id we find a picture of the less ideal situation in which the rider is obliged to guide his horse in the direction in which it itself wants to go.”
~Sigmund Freud, From New Introductory Lectures on Psychoanalysis, 1932.
So what does one do, to release the white-knuckled grip of ego? What do you do (in the moment) to be unaffected by words that sting or hurt? I asked our Facebook friends what they do when the ego gets in the way, and it’s difficult to let go, and forgive hurtful words or actions.
Here are some of their answers.
- “In Tolle’s book, A New Earth, he gave me one of the most amazing tools EVER! He provided this tool for whenever we are faced with ‘EGO’ or ‘Pain-Body’ issues. Become a witness and not a participant. Allow a space in front of you, become a witness in the ego’s unfolding and not a participant, bless it all and surrender it. IT works every time for me.” ~Iris
- “Take a look at this, it may be of help: Creating Moments of Joy: A Journal for Caregivers, Fourth Edition, by Jolene Brackey “ ~Hal
- “I listen to Hilary Stagg, Harpist. This Instrumental music allows you to feel the music, the ministry of it. I have found his music soothes and ministers to every person who walks into our shop and especially myself which prepares me to be able to minister to others throughout the day. Please listen to a sample of his music when you get a chance. Also “speak” to the persons spirit. Not at the body that the spirit houses. Just a thought.” ~Terri
- “I step back and visualize both of us as our “true” selves, sparks of God, when the trappings are taken away I remember that we’re all just sparks trying to find our way home. Takes my ego right out of the picture (a constantly battle btw).” ~Kelly
- With the Emotion Code from Dr. Bradley Nelson, you can help the person release trapped emotional energy that may be stuck in the radiant body of the individual. ~Evelyn
- “There are a lot of wise words here about peace and detachment. Still, I think one would be wise to be open-minded if chocolate cheesecake is an option.”~Jerry
- “I am remembering a technique I use when life is chaotic. Sometimes I have used this imagination technique where I become a worm or a butterfly or something that is unaffected and not burdened by these kinds of worries and emotions. Yay!! Time for worm meditations.” ~Jean
- “Chips Ahoy Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies with a 1/4 inch of Philly Cream Cheese on top. Self indulgent/pure decadence!” ~Mark
Ha,ha! We here at MBHA might not choose to try your amazing suggestion, Mark, but thanks so much for the smiles! 😉
- “I talk to my angels; they always help when asked.” ~Ronni
- “I write myself notes reminding myself that I am a beautiful and loving human being. I have found that the person who hurts me the most is myself because I decide to use other people’s words to hurt me. I have the choice to love myself and accept a viewpoint that is beneficial to my well being. Sometimes that means to listen to what others say and realize how I can benefit from their words, clear any obstacles to love, thereby allowing love to flow more freely through me. Love you and thank you so much for asking the question because it is always a great reminder of what true love is capable of!!!” ~Liana
“Yoga helps me.” ~Debbie
- “It also helps to write the qualities you’re working on in a note. Write it in the present tense– (e.g,I am happy… I enjoy a fulfilling relationship with… etc, etc). Then CARRY IT IN YOUR POCKET! I just read this tip in the paper the other day. There was a study done and when people carried good things about themselves in their pocket, they felt better and improved their lives. It was also studied to write bad things down and tear them up or throw away… and of course, surrender is key. You can write whatever you aspire to, but then you surrender it to the good of the whole.” ~Bonnie
Thanks to all our friends for their wonderful tips. We at MBHA invite YOU to share with us what you do to gain control over the ego, release judgment toward others, practice forgiveness and tolerance, and let go of the need to be right. We leave you with Sai Baba’s final word and the quote for today on our beautiful free poster gift to you.
“Give up all bad qualities in you, banish the ego and develop the spirit of surrender. You will then experience Bliss.”
~Sri Sathya Sai Baba
Best wishes to you with gratitude and appreciation,
Your health and wellness friends at MBHA